A Lifelong Skill: 3 Ways to Guide Children to Play Through the Years
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May 25, 2023The social media world, even for adults and especially for children, can be challenging to navigate, as it’s ever-changing and evolving. Kids need to head outside and spend less time in front of their screens, and as parents, it’s important to implement some rules to help strike that balance.
In a recent poll, parents shared that 50 percent of children 10 to 12 years of age and 33 percent of children 7 to 9 use social media apps. It’s important to talk to your children about what social media is and set ground rules for usage. One of the main messages: social media does not always show what “real-life” is really like. We are constantly bombarded with different lifestyles and the “good moments” that people choose to show on their social pages – but those are not always an accurate depiction of real life.
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One study shows that children under the age of 11 who use social media apps like Instagram and Snapchat are more likely to have negative digital behaviors, such as only having internet friends, following sites and pages that their parents would not approve of or taking part in online harassment. Another study shows that children who use social media, like TikTok for example, typically experience more stress and anxiety and have lower self-esteem.
Homework and household chores can also be made more difficult for children who may become irritable when pulled away from the screen. In fact, Kate Eshleman, PsyD., a child psychologist, says, “They’re being asked to do something they don’t want to do and stop doing something they enjoy.”
While social media and the internet is important for social connection and communication, it’s equally important to understand how to help moderate your children’s screen time, while promoting play at the same time. For parents and caregivers, fighting the allure of social media and screen time can feel like an uphill battle, but by setting limits, encouraging other forms of entertainment, like play, having open and honest conversations with children and modeling behavior, screen time can become more manageable.
1. Set limits and encourage play
Children and families who take time away from screens to spend time together and play typically reap more positive physical, mental, emotional, and social benefits. By encouraging play year-round – whether it’s indoor play through crafts or board games or sports and heading to the playground, children can log off from social media to engage in quality time with friends and family.
Screen time should never take the place of physical activity, particularly as children are growing and developing. In fact, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends limiting screen time to two hours a day for children.
As parents and caregivers, advocating for physical activity and play and limiting screen time and social media use can show your kids the value you place on a healthy, active lifestyle. There are screen time apps that automatically set limits for your children’s use, which is a great way to set a boundary and make sure it’s consistently enforced, without having to manually do it yourself.
2. Talk with your kids
Keep the lines of communication open and have a proactive, healthy conversation with your children about the effects of social media and the importance of balance.
Be sure to set some ground rules for your kids. Limit their daily social media consumption, put a limit to the number of apps they can have at one time, and build trust so that they feel comfortable telling you if they run into anything suspicious online. And keep an eye out yourself – if you see something on a social media app that is concerning you, don’t hesitate to bring it up to your child(ren).
3. Model behavior
Practice positive social media behaviors in front of your kids to show them that balance is possible. At the same time, engage in play with them away from screens. Children pick up on the habits of adults, so be sure to model the behavior you want them to display. For example, put phones away at dinner, avoid using your phone an hour before bedtime, set special times to be and play “together” without phones, and put a limit on your overall screen time.
It’s unreasonable to expect children to eliminate screen time completely. That’s why it’s important to talk to your children and have open and honest conversations about the pros and cons of social media and screens. Be sure to carve out time away from screens throughout the days and create a sense of togetherness that doesn’t require scrolling.
